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Author Topic: wwtbam questions  (Read 7362 times)

uncamark

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2008, 12:12:39 PM »
[quote name=\'dale_grass\' post=\'179853\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 12:11 AM\']
[quote name=\'clemon79\' post=\'179834\' date=\'Mar 3 2008, 11:21 PM\']
"YES! You are CORRECT sir!"
[/quote]

"May your sister kiss a diseased yak."
[/quote]

"Carnac requests complete silence."

"You get that most nights."

Matt Ottinger

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #16 on: March 04, 2008, 12:32:00 PM »
Carnac:  "Dustin Hoffman"

Ed:  "Dustin Hoffman"

Carnac:  "Describe someone cleaning his Hoffman"
This has been another installment of Matt Ottinger's Masters of the Obvious.
Stay tuned for all the obsessive-compulsive fun of Words Have Meanings.

clemon79

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #17 on: March 04, 2008, 01:41:47 PM »
I just have to take a moment to say that the people who are pumping out the Carson DVDs would make a MINT if they would do an entire Carnac set.

/and an Art Fern
Chris Lemon, King Fool, Director of Suck Consolidation
http://fredsmythe.com
Email: clemon79@outlook.com  |  Skype: FredSmythe

MikeK

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #18 on: March 04, 2008, 01:47:15 PM »
Carnac:  "John Paul, Ivory, and Chuck Barris."

McMahon:  "John Paul, Ivory, and Chuck Barris."

Carnac:  "Name a pope, a soap, and a dope."

/Would buy Lemon's suggested Carnac and Art Fern DVDs in a friggin' heartbeat

clemon79

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #19 on: March 04, 2008, 02:02:07 PM »
[quote name=\'MikeK\' post=\'179890\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 10:47 AM\']
Carnac:  "Name a pope, a soap, and a dope."[/quote]
Now, see, I prefer the construct of that one where he leaves the punchline unsaid:

Carnac: "The Blarney Stone, Argyle, and Dave Price."

Ed: "The Blarney Stone, Argyle, and Dave Price."

Carnac: "Name a rock, a sock, and a CBS weatherman."

/may a yak in heat become your sister's French tutor
Chris Lemon, King Fool, Director of Suck Consolidation
http://fredsmythe.com
Email: clemon79@outlook.com  |  Skype: FredSmythe

Matt Ottinger

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #20 on: March 04, 2008, 03:19:11 PM »
[quote name=\'clemon79\' post=\'179893\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 02:02 PM\']
Now, see, I prefer the construct of that one where he leaves the punchline unsaid[/quote]
The beauty of the bit, we all have our favorite "types".  Mine were the ones that really defied traditional punchlines.

"Hey Diddle Diddle"

"How do you greet your Diddle Diddle?"

"Hickory Dickory Dock"

"Who do you go to when you have a pain in your hickory dickory?"
This has been another installment of Matt Ottinger's Masters of the Obvious.
Stay tuned for all the obsessive-compulsive fun of Words Have Meanings.

lobster

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #21 on: March 04, 2008, 05:44:14 PM »
a treasure trove of 37 Carnac clips


    carnac: Dippity Do

    ed: Dippity Do

    carnac: what forms on your dippity early in the morning?

Jay Temple

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #22 on: March 04, 2008, 06:59:45 PM »
A: Shish-kebab

Q: How do you tell Kebab to be quiet?
Protecting idiots from themselves just leads to more idiots.

clemon79

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« Reply #23 on: March 04, 2008, 07:03:15 PM »
Okay, normally these threads get tiring after a while, but I just never tire of good Carnac bits. :)
Chris Lemon, King Fool, Director of Suck Consolidation
http://fredsmythe.com
Email: clemon79@outlook.com  |  Skype: FredSmythe

Casey

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #24 on: March 04, 2008, 07:04:47 PM »
One I just happened to see:

A: Peter Pan.

Q: What do you use to fry a Peter?

MikeK

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« Reply #25 on: March 04, 2008, 09:26:15 PM »
One of my fave Carnac lines, for obvious reasons:  May a mathematician do a number to your sister.

When a local station ran 2 hour blocks of Carson's Comedy Classics in 2005, I saved a good number of Carnac and Art Fern segments to DVD.  Now I must find them...

dale_grass

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« Reply #26 on: March 04, 2008, 09:33:45 PM »
Pop Quiz: What four things are you supposed to do once you get to the Slauson Cut-off?
« Last Edit: March 04, 2008, 09:34:15 PM by dale_grass »

MikeK

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« Reply #27 on: March 04, 2008, 09:50:01 PM »
[quote name=\'dale_grass\' post=\'179997\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 09:33 PM\']Pop Quiz: What four things are you supposed to do once you get to the Slauson Cut-off?[/quote]
1.  Get out of your car
2.  Cut off your Slauson
3.  Get back in your car
4.  Drive 5 miles until you find the giant neon plunger or another giant neon item?

Now back to Dennis James, Art James, Art Fleming, Peggy Fleming, Peggy Cass, Mama Cass, and Sticky the Wonder Mule in "Ma and Pa Kettle Open Up a Brothel."

*Johnny Carson starts sucking face with Carol Wayne or Teresa Ganzel while an old movie plays*

dale_grass

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« Reply #28 on: March 04, 2008, 10:08:57 PM »
[quote name=\'MikeK\' post=\'179998\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 10:50 PM\']
[quote name=\'dale_grass\' post=\'179997\' date=\'Mar 4 2008, 09:33 PM\']Pop Quiz: What four things are you supposed to do once you get to the Slauson Cut-off?[/quote]
1.  Get out of your car
2.  Cut off your Slauson
3.  Get back in your car
4.  Drive 5 miles until you find the giant neon plunger or another giant neon item?

Now back to Dennis James, Art James, Art Fleming, Peggy Fleming, Peggy Cass, Mama Cass, and Sticky the Wonder Mule in "Ma and Pa Kettle Open Up a Brothel."

*Johnny Carson starts sucking face with Carol Wayne or Teresa Ganzel while an old movie plays*
[/quote]
Kee-rect.  

\Has Squirt the Wonder Skunk been in any recent projects?

TimK2003

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wwtbam questions
« Reply #29 on: March 04, 2008, 10:27:28 PM »
[Carnac]  "A Blarney Stone"

[Ed]  "A Blarney Stone"

[Carnac]  "What do Irishmen have a hard time passing through their Shaleleighs"

/Carnac was an excellent Jeopardy! player